Emotional Jeopardy

OK, so he broods.  He's wrestling with some personal stuff, things I cannot help him with and he broods.  He goes into his emotional man cave and he stares into his existential belly button and doesn't talk.  I end up feeling like a sad court jester trying to cheer him up or at least take his mind off things for a while.  But that doesn't really work and I end up feeling dumb.  So that make me start to shut down emotionally.  I go into my version of the man cave - I stop talking, stop interacting with him and sometimes with everyone else too.  I usually end up just going to sleep, since he does this a lot at the end of the day.  The next morning he's all smiles and hugs and "good morning honey" and I'm still feeling shut down.  It's hard to get back to normal after this - I just don't switch gears that fast.

This would be so much easier if I didn't love him so much and know that he loves me.  It is really really hard to watch someone go through something really difficult and know that you can't help.  I'm a doer - I take action.  I am a planner and a fairly proactive person, at least for other people.  For myself, I can be a bit of a procrastinator.  But in this situation, which has been going on for almost a year, I cannot do a damn thing.  I can be there for him, but he doesn't really want that.  I can give him advice and he listens and he knows I am right but he still doesn't do anything.

I hope this will resolve itself soon.  He can't go on like this too much longer before he cracks.

Emotional Jeopardy

OK, so he broods.  He's wrestling with some personal stuff, things I cannot help him with and he broods.  He goes into his emotional man cave and he stares into his existential belly button and doesn't talk.  I end up feeling like a sad court jester trying to cheer him up or at least take his mind off things for a while.  But that doesn't really work and I end up feeling dumb.  So that make me start to shut down emotionally.  I go into my version of the man cave - I stop talking, stop interacting with him and sometimes with everyone else too.  I usually end up just going to sleep, since he does this a lot at the end of the day.  The next morning he's all smiles and hugs and "good morning honey" and I'm still feeling shut down.  It's hard to get back to normal after this - I just don't switch gears that fast.

This would be so much easier if I didn't love him so much and know that he loves me.  It is really really hard to watch someone go through something really difficult and know that you can't help.  I'm a doer - I take action.  I am a planner and a fairly proactive person, at least for other people.  For myself, I can be a bit of a procrastinator.  But in this situation, which has been going on for almost a year, I cannot do a damn thing.  I can be there for him, but he doesn't really want that.  I can give him advice and he listens and he knows I am right but he still doesn't do anything.

I hope this will resolve itself soon.  He can't go on like this too much longer before he cracks.

I can hear the crickets

That's how quiet it is around my office today.  And was yesterday too.  When a major Federal holiday falls in the middle of the week it seems to kill the entire 5 days.  They really ought to think about moving Independence Day to a Monday holiday.  I know, sacrilige.  But there is NOTHING getting done around here today and I think this sad situation is being replicated in offices all around NYC and all around the USA.  Someone should do a productivity study - heck, someone probably already has.  I think there would be a lot more getting done if we just had Monday off and then worked the rest of the week.  On the other hand, who am I to argue with the fact that for me, today is Friday.  I'm off tomorrow and Thursday and Friday.  You can hear me smiling, can't you?  For those of you who have been paying attention this means I had a 4 day weekend last week and a 5 day weekend this week.  It's a wonderful thing.  Of course, I won't be taking anymore time off until Labor Day week so don't be too mad at me.

I can hear the crickets

That's how quiet it is around my office today.  And was yesterday too.  When a major Federal holiday falls in the middle of the week it seems to kill the entire 5 days.  They really ought to think about moving Independence Day to a Monday holiday.  I know, sacrilige.  But there is NOTHING getting done around here today and I think this sad situation is being replicated in offices all around NYC and all around the USA.  Someone should do a productivity study - heck, someone probably already has.  I think there would be a lot more getting done if we just had Monday off and then worked the rest of the week.  On the other hand, who am I to argue with the fact that for me, today is Friday.  I'm off tomorrow and Thursday and Friday.  You can hear me smiling, can't you?  For those of you who have been paying attention this means I had a 4 day weekend last week and a 5 day weekend this week.  It's a wonderful thing.  Of course, I won't be taking anymore time off until Labor Day week so don't be too mad at me.