kukla_red: (Default)
Today is Yom Kippur, the Jewish day of Atonement and contemplation.  I'm hardly the best or most observant Jew around, so I handle this according to my personal code.  I can't fast because that road leads straight to a migraine, which I seriously do NOT want.  Believe me, you don't want me with a migraine either.  It's downright scary.  I don't go to a synagogue for various reasons.  I used to belong to one and I really enjoyed going to weekly services and celebrating the High Holy Days with my fellow congregants.  But the politics and backbiting crept in - as it usually does - and I felt that I could no long participate.  But I will not go to work on this day unless I am in danger of losing my job.  It is the highest of the holy days and I just can't do it.  So I stay home, putter around and contemplate my life.

This has been a very momentous year.  Sarah finishing high school, graduating and going off to UVM.  Aaron getting a serious girl friend, finally starting to develop into a real adult and finding his niche at Champlain College.  Me making a big, scary change by leaving my secure but sometimes aggravating law firm job to join another vendor company, hopefully with more success than past ventures into the "dark side".  So far, so good on that score.  David and I becoming "empty nesters" and seeing what our future will be like now that the kids are not ever present.  We've recommitted to each other more deeply and we're making plans for our eventual escape to Vermont on a permanent basis. 

Today is also Aaron's 21st birthday, a momentous occasion in its own right.  I can remember the day of his birth so clearly - it doesn't seem possible that it was 21 years ago.  I had a very rough time with the pregnancy and the delivery was no different.  He was 12 days overdue and when I finally did go into labor it was not productive.  He didn't fit down the chute so the doctor called for an emergency C section and they went in and got him.  When it was all over and the nurse placed him in my arms, I said "So you are the one who has been kicking me all this time!"  I also could tell immediately that he was a lefty.  He was beautiful, perfect and amazing.  

My marriage completely sucked and sometimes I think I knew that going into my wedding day.  But I think I was meant to have these 2 children and that wouldn't have happened if I hadn't married my ex.  So be it.  It was worth it.

Happy Birthday, Aaron!



Aaron and Sarah at his dorm in September.

kukla_red: (Default)
Today is Yom Kippur, the Jewish day of Atonement and contemplation.  I'm hardly the best or most observant Jew around, so I handle this according to my personal code.  I can't fast because that road leads straight to a migraine, which I seriously do NOT want.  Believe me, you don't want me with a migraine either.  It's downright scary.  I don't go to a synagogue for various reasons.  I used to belong to one and I really enjoyed going to weekly services and celebrating the High Holy Days with my fellow congregants.  But the politics and backbiting crept in - as it usually does - and I felt that I could no long participate.  But I will not go to work on this day unless I am in danger of losing my job.  It is the highest of the holy days and I just can't do it.  So I stay home, putter around and contemplate my life.

This has been a very momentous year.  Sarah finishing high school, graduating and going off to UVM.  Aaron getting a serious girl friend, finally starting to develop into a real adult and finding his niche at Champlain College.  Me making a big, scary change by leaving my secure but sometimes aggravating law firm job to join another vendor company, hopefully with more success than past ventures into the "dark side".  So far, so good on that score.  David and I becoming "empty nesters" and seeing what our future will be like now that the kids are not ever present.  We've recommitted to each other more deeply and we're making plans for our eventual escape to Vermont on a permanent basis. 

Today is also Aaron's 21st birthday, a momentous occasion in its own right.  I can remember the day of his birth so clearly - it doesn't seem possible that it was 21 years ago.  I had a very rough time with the pregnancy and the delivery was no different.  He was 12 days overdue and when I finally did go into labor it was not productive.  He didn't fit down the chute so the doctor called for an emergency C section and they went in and got him.  When it was all over and the nurse placed him in my arms, I said "So you are the one who has been kicking me all this time!"  I also could tell immediately that he was a lefty.  He was beautiful, perfect and amazing.  

My marriage completely sucked and sometimes I think I knew that going into my wedding day.  But I think I was meant to have these 2 children and that wouldn't have happened if I hadn't married my ex.  So be it.  It was worth it.

Happy Birthday, Aaron!



Aaron and Sarah at his dorm in September.

kukla_red: (Default)
To be the friend I want to be.
To be the mother I want to be.
To be the partner I want to be.
To be the employee I want to be.

To be me.
kukla_red: (Default)
To be the friend I want to be.
To be the mother I want to be.
To be the partner I want to be.
To be the employee I want to be.

To be me.

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